Sunday, April 29, 2007

Golf, Yaris, and everything in between.

I went golfing for the first time this year. A few friends and myself headed out for a 8:10 AM tee time.
That's pretty early for a Saturday morning for me. I usually like to leave the alarm off on Friday night, and sleep until my body tells me to get up on Saturday.

Now I am not an avid golfer, but I do enjoy it when I get the chance. I shot a 118, which I have no idea whether is in line with my normal game, since I don't have a normal game yet.
I do plan on golfing a lot more this year, so we'll have to see how much that score comes down.
We also had lots of fun loosening the strap on one of our friends golf carts, and his bag kept falling off the cart as he accelerated. Quite funny from our perspective.

On the car front, I still have the Yaris. I have to take it back tomorrow though, so one more sleep and bye bye Yaris.
Yes, the inspector from the insurance company looked over my car, and decided it would be a write-off. I was offered an amount, and went down at the end of the day to sign the papers.
I arrived 2 minutes before closing, but they were already closed.
I did manage to get my belongings from the car, as that section of the place was still open another few hours.
Afterward, I went home, and spoke to my next door neighbor (he's a mechanic, and quite in the know on a lot of different subjects. He's usually a good sounding board for problems).
My neighbor was very upset I hadn't told him what the write-off offer was earlier, previous to going down to sign the papers. Luckily I hadn't signed the papers, because my neighbor explained I was getting low balled on the offer. They didn't even consider the recent (within the last 8 months) work and new parts put in to my car.
So tonight I called another friend of mine who also happens to work at the insurance company, and asked him what I should do in terms of getting a better settlement.
I don't plan on using this friends name or anything, I just wanted his opinion, since he is already in the business, and is a car insurance inspector himself.
He said yes, they should have taken the value of the parts into consideration on the total amount of the claim.
So tomorrow I will calling back my adjuster, and seeing what sort of compromise we can attain.

Keep in mind also, I work in a big call center company, and have been on the receiving end of customers feeling they were just ripped off, or screwed on their bills. So I am not about to go "postal" on these guys. I know going in the best way to get what you want is through politeness. People respond better to calming, peaceful conversation, that they do to yelling and cursing.
So I will be calm, cool, collected, and in the end I will get a fair price for my written off vehicle.

As a parting thought, one which I plan on writing more on in the future, I want to say how much I am a fan of the old series from the 60's called The Prisoner. It starred Patrick McGoohan, and I am so happy they are making brand bew series based on the original.
It's being made for a British satellite company called Sky One, and should hit the airwaves in January 2008.
Cross your finger, I think it will be a great new series.

And to give you something interesting to watch, here are a couple videos with the Prisoner in mind.

Here is The Arrival, the first episode in the series. Watch, and by hook or by crook, you will be hooked.

Episode 1, part 1

Episode 1, part 2

Episode 1, part 3

Episode 1, part 4

Episode 1, part 5


Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Espresso. How much is that crazy cup-o-java anyway?

Ahhh latest vice.

To be more precise, I have developed a small addiction for long pour, espresso machiato, triple shot from Starbucks. Yes, I know, another staunch Tim Horton's drinking, maple leaf carrying Canadian succumbs to the overpriced giant from South of the border. And indeed, that's exactly what has happened.

Up until a couple months ago, I hadn't even had a sip of Starbucks coffee. Not one drop. I had the thought in my head of holding out to the very end before I would pay for coffee by taking out a second mortgage.
I was a Tim Horton's fan all the way. Extra large, black. No frill. Just the basics in large quantities, and caffeine injected.
I would extol the virtues of a nice, solid cup of joe to anyone willing to listen. "Why pay so much for a Starbucks coffee when you can easily afford several cups of Tim's for the same amount?" I would say.
Tim's was the one for me, and nobody could tell me different.....

.....until I tried my first Starbucks coffee.

I don't really think I was hooked at after the first cup though. I had always been a XL black coffee drinker, so that's what I had when I went to Starbucks that first time.
The next day, my car pool buddy and me were back at Starbucks, but this time I wanted an espresso. The Machiato had a cool name, so I ordered that. YUM!
That's all I drank for a couple weeks, adding an extra shot here and there to spice it up, and to increase the caffeine intake from time to time.

Now I wouldn't call myself a coffee aficionado like another red-headed friend of mine, but I can appreciate a good cup. Starbucks coffee was, in my opinion, aa better cup than Tim's.

Then one day we stopped at a different Starbucks on the way to work, and of course I ordered the Espresso Machiato triple shot ($2.83 in my Canadian city). As I left the Starbucks, I took a sip, and immediately knew something was different. This was a really good espresso. Better than the ones I had been getting at the first Starbucks I went to.
From then on we came to this new location all the time. They simply knew how to make a better cup of coffee there.
I was eventually told of the long pour for espresso, where they run a second blast of water or steam through the espresso beans. You get double the amount of espresso, and for my taste, it cuts the bitterness down slightly. So I get a long pour, espresso machiato, triple shot, with 3 splenda mixed in.

So after that extremely long run-on story, I now have the reason I wanted to post today, my recent experience with trying to get an espresso at Tim Horton's.
I will preface this by saying Tim Horton's mostly sells coffee. Nothing fancy for most Tim's drinkers. Just joe, and that's all. So it's no surprise what happened to me a couple days ago.

Here is the dialog as it happened on Friday last week. Enjoy!

A fellow manager where I work, who is a Tim Horton's fan, wanted to go for coffee at around 10 AM (his ulterior motive was to get there in time to get a breakfast sandwich). So we go to Tim Horton's.
It's pretty busy there, but we make our way through the line, and eventually get to the counter.
I look up at the manu on the wall behind the cashier, and see they do indeed have espresso. Small was $1.19, large was $1.59, and extra shots were $0.40. Super, I would be all set I thought.
Looking at the cashier (Margaretta was the name on her tag) I say "I'll have a large espresso, with two extra shots please."
Without hesitation, she blurts out "Oh, we only have one size of espresso."
I look at her, then up to the menu behind her, and say "Oh, cuz it says right there that you guys have a small and a large espresso."
She responds with "Oh, well the large is actually the 'double espresso', not large."
I take a moment to inhale the information, and try ordering again, "Ok, I'll have a double espresso with two extra shots please."
She responds now with "Sorry, we don't sell extra shots."
I blink.
Turn my attention once again to the menu behind her, and point as I say "But it says right there on your menu that extra shots are forty cents."
She then says "Oh, I see, ok. Well, let me see here, right. Ooookay, so that'll be $3.59."
I look of bewinderment runs across my face, and I tell her "Um, I don't think that's right. It looks like you just punched in two double espressos."
She responds "Yes, double espresso, and double espresso. Four shots right?"
I say "No, I wanted a double espresso with two extra shots. So, what you should have punched in was $1.59, plus forty cents plus forty cents.....correct?"
Looking a little flustered, and trying to analyze the keys on the cash register.....unsuccessfully....she throws her hands up in front of her face, and backs away from the cash register, and says "I don't know, I can't do it, I don't know how to punch this in."
She proceeds to call over her supervisor who, after several attempts, gets the order punched in correctly.
A sigh of relief escapes my mouth, and I happen to catch a glimpse of the 15 or so people standing in line behind me. I was thinking all the people in line behind me were well aware of what I had ordered, and I was sure each and every one of them were giving their own instructions in their heads to the cashier.
Eventually, after a few minutes of waiting, my espresso arrives. My guess is they needed to plug in the espresso machine before making my drink, and that's what took so long.
So I try the espresso......awful!

I suppose there isn't really any punch line or moral here. But personally, I am more impressed now than ever, that Starbucks can make a killer cup of coffee.

Pay for a better shirt, and you can tell the difference. Pay for a better cup of coffee, and you can tell the difference also.

If you can afford it, I highly recommend paying the extra, to get the extra you are looking for.

End of story.


Sunday, April 22, 2007

My Own Private Email Server.....

A few weeks ago I purchased my own domain name. I thought I would use it for my own email server, personal web site, and whatever else I could think of.

Step one complete - email server has been installed, and is functioning within normal parameters. I tested it out, and all seems to be great. I am pretty happy.

So now I am officially a Postmaster for an email server. And once I have something ready for my web site, I will be a webmaster.

And to add to the awesomeness of my email server news, here is a picture of the inner working of my server:


Yaris and Me.....

So, I woke up on Friday morning, got ready for work, and stepped out my back door to head for my car.
But there was a slight problem with that car was not there!
Yessir, my car was stolen.
I was, and am still, pretty calm about it. There was wasn't much of value in the car, just the usual car things like windshield washer fluid, shovels in the trunk, rubber get the picture.
So what's to be mad about? I took a cab to work, called the police and MPI (Manitoba Public Insurance), and this morning went to Enterprise Car Rentals and got my rental car (I have the rental insurance on my Autopac, so I'm covered up to $39.02 per day on a rental).
And as it turns out, I get to drive around in an orange chicklet for the next little orange colored Yaris.
I am pretty sure this is the smallest car on Earth. Well, it sure felt like it when I got in to drive it today.
But what the heck, it's a free car for a while, and I'll have fun with it.

So this will speed up my car buying process, especially if my car comes back and is written by MPI.

If you want to see what sort of power this Yarris has, I will be accepting challenges starting Monday. You have to run, and I get to drive the Yaris....should be close races.



Thursday, April 19, 2007


I am so tired I cannot think of anything of importance to post tonight.

So instead I will just list some of my favorite movies.

Breathless, Snatch, The Sound Of Music, Groundhog Day, Dogma, Reservoir Dogs, 40 Year Old Virgin, Gladiator, The Untouchables, Lord Of The Rings (all 3), Star Wars (all 6), Goodfellas, Silence Of The Lambs, The Matrix (all 3), It's A Wonderful Life, A Clockwork Orange, Alien, Aliens, Forrest Gump, Resident Evil, Ocean's 11 (new version), Million Dollar Baby, Braveheart, Blade Runner, Donnie Darko, The Princess Bride, Stand By Me, A Christmas Story, Walk The Line, Home Alone, I Robot, Beverly Hills Cop, Mission Impossible (all 3), Back To The Future), The Mummy, The Mummy Returns, 300, Mr & Mrs Smith, Robin Hood: Prince Of Thieves, Pretty Woman, Top Gun, Rain Man, Wedding Crashers, Jerry Maguire, A Few Good Men, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Troy, An Officer and a Gentleman, Moulin Rouge, The Pelican Brief, The Shawshank Redemption, JFK, Brazil, Ferris Bueller's Day Off

And, just for kicks, here is a video to amuse you as well.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Marathon Man

I have made a decision to run a half marathon this year on Father's Day. This decision was made on the spur of the moment, without much thought. My bad.
Had I thought about this decision at any length, I should have come to the realization I would not have enough time to train properly, and get into shape for this marathon.
Yes it's only the half marathon......but it's still a WHOLE HALF MARATHON!
Am I crazy? Quite possibly.
Will I run this half marathon? You betcha!

A while back I had been trolling the blogosphere (first time using that term - fyi), and came across an interesting article about cause-effect vs intention-manifestation (IM). Good reading. In fact, to be somewhat off topic, I highly recommend reading a lot of the articles at that site, some are quite good.
So if you break down the idea of intention-manifestation to it's basic principles, it is telling us the most difficult part of getting something making the decision to do it. Sounds pretty simple, and when you really think about it, it is indeed fairly simple.
But, how do we normally get to the point of making any decision. Like most people we will weigh the good against the bad, possible jeopardies, benefits, drawbacks, possible conflicts, etc, and it takes a while to make decisions. Think about any decision you consciously made, and ask yourself honestly whether you made the decision based on what outcome you wanted, or after the above mentioned decision making process we all use? I am betting you had to weigh a few things first (abd this could have been done fast), and then you made a decision.
The intention-manifestation model says not to weigh anything, just make the decision first, based on what outcome you want, and then figure out afterwards what needs to be accomplished to achieve the target.
Easy as pie.
If you use this IM model, you are so much further along in achieving the target, than you would be if you weighed out everything before making the decision.
Think about your workplace. If you are working in an environment where you are given sales targets, service level agreements, or any expectations at all, you are practicing IM already.
For instance if your boss tell you he wants you to make 500 sales by the end of the month, what is the process for you hitting that target?
Well first, you hear the target. The decision to make that target is next, and you will usually make that decision because your job is on the line otherwise.
So now all you have to do is plan how to reach that goal. Simple.

Apply that strategy to decisions you would normally take a long time to make, or have weigh and weigh numerous items before making the decision. You will find making decisions much easier, and then your focus can be on the plan to reach the goal, rather than whether or not you are even going to make the decision to create a goal.

My two examples are quitting smoking, and running the marathon.

I used IM, and made the decision at work one day, that I was quitting smoking that night. I then figured out how to get there and stay there. It will tell you this, after making the decision, I was so happy. I didn't think about the stress I would have from meetings later in the week, and maybe I should delay quitting until after the meeting. No sir, I made a decision and that was that.

Today - still smoke free. Been 8 months. Yay me!

Example two is the marathon. I decided to do it, and now have to figure out how I will achieve that goal. I know I will do it, but I fear my procrastination on training will hurt me badly in the end.

I think ultimately the move towards IM is a positive thing, and part of me working on me. I am committing to myself to keep promises. I used to break them all the time, and took the promise itself out of my life. I would not promise things at all for the longest time, knowing I was bad at keeping a promise.
I am slowly bringing the promise back into my life, and IM is helping. It's my own private contract with myself. I know I've made decisions, and I can't fool myself. I have to make good on my own decisions now, since I am the only one accountable for me.

And I won't apologize for my run-on sentences, and my explanations which take far too much time to get to my points. That's the way I write. But do check out the article I linked earlier, As Steve Pavlina does a far better job of explaining it all in his article than I do.

And that's all I have to say about that.


Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Music soothes the mind

Well, I finally moved into the modern era.....I have purchased an MP3 player! Specifically a Creative Labs - ZEN V PLUS. 2 gig.

I am starting up jogging/running in preparation for a half marathon in a couple months, and needed a more portable and shock resistant device than my current mini disc player.
Don't get me wrong, the mini disc is a sweet piece of electronics, but the MP3 player is just so much more adaptable for what I need it for.

So, I installed the software on my computer, and moved over some music files. I took my Zen to work today, but only had time to use it for about 10 minutes. So far so good.
I expect it will be a good unit, as Creative is a reputable company when it comes to sound production.

I will test out the boundaries of my new toy, and report back at a later time.


Sunday, April 15, 2007


We all have people we trust, people we hang out with, people we confide in, people we laugh with, and people we cry with.

We all have friends.

Friends are the glue that hold us together every day. Friends can make you smile when you are having the worst day of your life. Friends are a comforting, familiar face, in a crowded room full of strangers. Friends, for the most part, are the people you are proud of the most, the ones who you would tell other people "I know that guy."

I have quite a few people I would call friends. I even have a few I would call best friends. and I also have far too many people I call acquaintances.

But let's break it down a little bit.

Acquaintances - people I know, would say hello to, nod at, stop and shoot the breeze with. People I may remember a few key things about their life, and 75% of the time, I would remember their name.
These are the people who you say you know, if someone ask you if you know them. "Yeah I know Vinny, he's a hell of a guy." But really, that's about as in depth as it would get. I have no idea whether Vinny is, in fact, a hell of a guy, but that's what I would tell people.

Friends - Friends are there for you. Friends are the ones you see often. And if they live out of town, you email, phone, or see them when they are back in town for the holidays. But, even if you miss the when they are back in town, a simple "sorry, I got really busy" would suffice for a friend. They understand you enough to not ask too many questions, and take what you are saying at face value.
Friends are the ones you will go out to the bars with, or out to a movie. Friends are the ones who will sell the Social tickets for your wedding, and make sure all of their friends come, because they have all gone to their friends' socials in the past.
Friends are the ones you would pick for your hockey team, or maybe plan a small road trip with.

Best Friends - Best friends are the ones who will be there no matter what. You break up with your significant other - they are there for you. Someone in your family dies, they are the shoulder to cry on. You need a few bucks to tide you over, they are the ones opening their wallets (this one is sketchy though, not all best friends, or friends for that matter, should lend out cash in my opinion. It can lead to ex-best friends).
Best friends will stay by your side, even though they know you may have done something morally wrong. They will not condone this behavior, but have such strong bonds to you, they will not leave your side.

I think one tends to gravitate to those who are like ones self. We make acquaintances with those who share common interests, or know the same people.
This is very easy to do, because there's always somewhere to find potential acquaintances. Work, school, online web sites, you can find a new acquaintance without trying very hard.
The question then, becomes how do you, if at all, turn and acquaintance into a friend. Do you need more friends? Will this acquaintance be a good addition to your group of friends? Would you feel embarrassed if you were seen hanging around with this new person? All questions which run through your mind as you make new acquaintances.

It's a tough road at this point, whether to bring that new person into your life. You don't really know what the result will be if unless you take a chance.

It's the same with life and love though. If you don't take the chance, you will never know what could have been. Such is the premise for many a song and movie.

Next time you are walking down the street and pass by someone you don't know, stop for a moment and think about that person. You don't know them, but what if you did? What would it take to start up a conversation with that person, and get to know them a little. How would that tiny conversation change your life? Or would it at all? What if that's the person you're supposed to marry? What's if that's your next new best friend?

The point is, you never know. And you never will until you make that first move.

So go make a new acquaintance, and see if you can parle that into a friendship.


Saturday, April 14, 2007

Sony: 1,000,000:1 OLED TV on sale in 2007

I was surfing around and came across an article about the Sony OLED technology coming out later this year.

Amazing what they come up with. Watch the videos and see for yourself!

I think I need to buy one once they are in the stores.


Friday, April 13, 2007

I'll Take Your Word For It.....

Most people these days are very weary about believing other people. Most people, in order to believe someone, need to see some proof or physical evidence to sway their opinion one way of the other.
You find a twenty dollar bill on the ground, and immediately someone walks up to you and says "hey, that's my money, I just dropped it". You would likely stop for a few moments, and maybe even ask a few questions before even contemplating handing over the money.
Taking someone's word on faith is a hard thing to grasp hold of. Well, let me clarify that. Hard to take a stranger's word, but easier to take a friend's word. that sounds more like it.
A friend is easier to believe because we already have a base to judge them from. We know them, know their habits, know if they are a habitual liar, know if they mostly tell the truth. We have probably witnessed most of our friends lying at one time or another as well, which would make it easier for us to spot them lying if they ever did it again.
Strangers though, well it's hard to know for sure if someone is lying. Some people have a knack for seeing right through people's lies, while others have no idea what's going on.

My story took place Monday this past week. After work, I had purchased a video game for my pc. They say hindsight is 20/20, so I'm not going to mention the game title, as I know now the game was a waste of my money. Anyway.....

.....I brought the game to the counter, and asked the girl there whether this game was a pay-to-play online type game. She looked at the box, then opened up the box and leafed through the manual. After 30 seconds or so, she said it looked like it was free to play online, and that most games now had a disclaimer on the box stating if it was a pay-to-play game.

I was relieved, and said I would buy it.

On the way home, I stopped and did some grocery shopping, dropped my car-pool passenger off at her house, and then went home.
I put away all the groceries, and cooked dinner for myself.
I had a leisurely dinner while watching some television, and at around 9:30 I decided to crack open the game and install it on my computer.
I open the box.....and my jaw dropped....

No disk.

I stared at the inside of the box for a while, swearing quite loudly, and cursing the store where I bought the game.

But as I started to calm down a little, I started to replay the events of the purchase in my head. That's when I realized I was likely part of the problem. I had interrupted the girls routine by asking a question at the counter. She even opened the box up, and looked through the manual. This must have thrown her off slightly, and I remember now she had not gone into the back room to get the disk for th game at that point.
For those who don't know, that's how most of these game stores work now. The game boxes are all out on display, but the disks are in the back room. You buy the game, and they go get the game or you.

So now I am thinking, how am I going to get the disk for this game? I have the game box and receipt, but no disk. If I walk into that store and say I didn't get a disk in this game box, are they going to believe me? Why should they? This sort of scenario probably happens a lot, with people trying to scam the store for a free game. The problem here is this was a legitimate missing disk, and how was I going to get it back?
I called the store, but it was past closing time, and nobody answered. I was just going to have to go down there the next day.

Tuesday morning, I've picked up my car-pool passenger, and am well on my way to work (past the point of no return), when I realize I have left the game box and receipt by my back door. Because that's where I put it so I wouldn't forget it in the morning.

Well, I forgot it.


I got to work, and a few times during the day I ran the scenario past a few people. Half thought the store would give me a disk. They were saying there would be records of the disk in the back room, and that it had not been given out.
The other half of the people were saying I was screwed. There's no way the store would believe me.
Well the only way to find out, would be to go there after work. Maybe I could at least let them know about the problem, and feel them out for a possible solution.

So I stop by there after work, and I explain the situation to the young man behind the counter. Luckily the girl who I had purchased the game from the day before, was working today as well. She was able to agree she had made a mistake. She was even going so far as to say she had made a few mistakes the day before because she was sooo tired. She said she remembered after I had left she hadn't given me the disk, but it had been too lat at that point.....I had already driven away.

So I was given the video game disk right there on the spot, without the receipt, with them just taking my word for it.

I was happy. Today I'm not happy because I've played the game and it sucks, but Tuesday I was happy.

I guess it got me thinking about how people make decisions, and why. Whether your relationship with that person would affect the level of trust. Whether your demeanor would affect the outcome of a situation.

I think having a positive outlook, speaking intelligently, and keeping your cool are some things which will help you to succeed in a situation like mine.
I used to take inbound customer service calls, and have dealt with difficult customers previously. I know people are much more willing to help you if you have a smile on your face, and are not yelling at them. A pleasant disposition can go a long way these days.

Smoke and mirrors can get you the same results, but that's a story for another day.

Take my word for it.


Monday, April 09, 2007

Buying Bulk.....

I used to think it was crazy, buying bulk groceries that is. I thought "what the hell would compel someone to buy massive jars of pickles, and huge cans of tuna?" It seemed preposterous you would have the urge to buy a vat of ketchup so big you could almost swim in it.

Then I got a membership at Costco.

Costco is a bulk food empire, where it's always busy, yet the shelves are always full.
You can buy fresh fruit, 2lb boxes of cereal, gallon jars of dill pickles, lawn furniture, exercise equipment, pre-made frozen sandwiches, computers, books, toys, 80 lb bags of dog food, packages of 60 rolls of bathroom tissue.......well you get the picture. Quite a lot to choose from, and all in big quantities.

I went initially with a friend of mine, let's call her Beatrice (names are anonymous here, remember). She walked me through the store, and I was amazed at the variety and quantity of the items there.
It was on the 3rd visit I signed up for a membership.

I suppose what I'm going for here, is I am quite happy to buy a nuclear sized chicken, or 40 dozen spring rolls, if it means I can get a deal. I may have to eat spring rolls for months afterward, but sweet Jesus did I pay cheap for 'em!!!

I recommend any big discount bulk store. Go shop to your hearts content, and you won't really have to go back for weeks after. You may be broke or have to take out a second mortgage to pay for your groceries, but you will be satisfied with the full freezer it will creates.

Happy gluttony everybody!


Sunday, April 08, 2007

Technorati Linking

Linking to Technorati

Facebook, the addiction

In late March 2007, like a couple weeks ago, someone sent me an invitation to join Facebook.
As someone who gets his fair share of spam, I was very tempted to discard this invitation without even investigating what exactly it was.
Had I deleted that email, I would not have become addicted to Facebook.
Since that email, and the ensuing creation of my account, I spend every spare second I have checking my Facebook page to see whether I have any updates from my friends. It is truly amazing to find I am so much addicted to this site.
For those of you who surf the internet endlessly, you will appreciate the addiction. All of us hardcore surfers will be hooked by one web site or another from time to time. We will spend every waking hour on that site for days and days. And then, as quickly as the addiction started, it subsides, and we go back to our normal routine of surfing.

This Facebook site seems to be different.
I have yet to get bored of it!
I will admit, I spend less time directly on my Facebook page now than when I had first joined. But, I always have a Firefox tab open to my Facebook page. And in between checking out other web sites and cool distractions on the web, I am always checking in on Facebook for any updates.

Yes, I would say I am addicted to Facebook. And it looks like this addiction has some teeth and staying power.

Time will tell whether my life goes downhill because of it. heh.


Saturday, April 07, 2007

YouTube Whore

So I've been doing a lot of surfing lately. A large portion of that surfing time has been spent on YouTube. It's very addictive. So much so I am now considering myself to be a YouTube whore!

But, I am not in the mood today to ramble on like I normally do, so instead I am going to post some of my more recent finds on YouTube. Namely the Mr Deity series.

Watch them, don't watch them. Makes no difference to me.

So here you go.....

Mr. Deity Episode 1: Mr. Deity and the Evil

Mr. Deity Episode 2: Mr. Deity and the Really Big Favor

Mr. Deity Episode 3: Mr. Deity and The Light

Mr. Deity Episode 4: Mr. Deity and the Messages

Mr. Deity Episode 5: Mr. Deity and Lucifer

Mr. Deity Superbowl Extra: The Press Conference

Mr. Deity Episode 7: Mr. Deity and the Tour de Hell

mr. Deity Episode 8: Mr. Deity and the Top Ten

Mr. Deity Episode 9: Mr. Deity and the Book

Someone at work told me about another series on YouTube called "Chad Vader". Funny stuff.
Here are the Chad Vader vids:

Chad Vader - Day Shift Manager (episode 1)

Chad Vader - Day Shift Manager (episode 2)

Chad Vader Episode 3


Chad Vader: Episode 4

Chad Vader: Episode 5 (Holiday Special)

Behind the scenes at Chad Vader Episode 5

Chad Vader -- Paparazzi in the Dressing Room of Episode 5

Chad Vader 6 Update

Chad Vader Episode 6

Chad Vader Episode 7 Update

Monday, April 02, 2007

Pant Splitting Humor.....

Oh, just in case you were wondering, the link in the above heading has nothing specifically to do with the heading itself, I just found some pants alteration link and put it in there. :P

Ok, so pants. Yes indeed they can be the butt, no pun intended, of a number of jokes and good spirited comments. We make fun of pants when.....they are too short, too tight, way too baggy, riding too low on the hips, they make a virtual boner when you sit down, are an ugly color, have rips in the wrong places, the waist is hidden under your spare tires, they are acid-washed.

Well, you get the picture. Any number of different things can go wrong with pants. All of which are funny to others, and just a horrible nightmare to you if you are the one being made fun of.

I have a pants story for you today. Now I will say this, I am a good natured person, who can take a joke, and even laugh at myself if it's funny enough. And that's where this story is going.

So I get into work today, after the weekend which included April Fool's Day, to find my office floor covered in little, plastic, Dixie cup type glasses. Each of the glasses was about 3/4 full of water. There were no spaces between the cups, and my chair was embedded in the middle of this ocean of water cups.
There was no way for me to even pull out my chair if I wanted to without spilling um-teen numbers of these water filled glasses.

Well played I say, well played. Wouldn't have thought of this one myself.

So after several requisite rounds of laughter, and jeering at my expense, I set about the task of dispensing with these little water glasses.

No easy task.

I had a large, empty, several gallon office type water bottle to use as a reservoir, and I started to pout these little water filled glasses into this bigger bottle.
I was squatting down, sitting on the balls of my feet doing this, and would routinely stand up to stretch out, or move to a better position.

Then something happened.....I heard, and felt, a light tear of fabric.

Now I have ripped the crotch out of a pair of pants before, as most of us have at some time or another. This one sounded minor.
I stood up, looked around to see if anyone was watching, and casually checked the seem in the crotch of my pants.

A small rip, whew! This was maybe about and inch long, something which was easily fixable with a needle and thread, provided I could find someone with a needle and thread.

So I continue to empty the little water filled glasses.

Now there are times during this process, where some of the supervisors I manage, are coming up to me and still poking fun at me, making funny comments, and sometimes asking legitimate questions about work. So I am constantly crouching down, then standing up, etc, etc, etc.
Each time I crouch down, I do the old "pull up the pant legs", and THEN I crouch down. This is the technique which usually stop pant crotches from ripping in the first place.
Well as it happens, I must have been distracted this last time. As I went into full crouch mode, there was a audible ripping sound, and I could feel the whole seem of the crotch of my pants let go.
This was not an inch or two, this was long, really long, too long to be able to walk around and pretend nothing was wrong. This was the kind of long which people point and laugh at when you walk by. This was long enough that I was hoping, and praying, that at least I was wearing black underwear to match the pants and camouflage the blinking neon sign that said "Hey, look at this guy, he split his pants WIDE OPEN!"

Well, I check the seem with my hand, and sure enough, it's a massive opening. I will not be able to hide this at all.

I look out of my office, and see a supervisor on my team sitting at his desk.....maybe he can help me. I pick up the phone and call his extension.

In a whispering, scared voice I say "Hey man, you gotta help me".

He says "What's wrong?"

I say "I blew out the crotch in my pants man."

He proceeds to spit coffee out his nose and giggle like a school girl. I suppose it's only fitting considering what I just told him.
So he comes over to my office, still laughing.
I get him to check how the back looks, and yessir, the rip is evident.

From here the story gets pretty boring. But, it all turns out for the good. I decide I will need to go buy a pair of pants. I call another manager, and she agrees to come with me to shop for pants.
I end up getting a pair of pants, 2 pairs of shoes, 2 shirts, a belt, and a People magazine.
The real surprise of this whole situation, was I was not in a great mood after ripping my pants. But, after shopping and buying way too much stuff, I was in a great mood. Shopping made me happy.
I suppose shopping, in the end, is just an endorphin-releasing activity. I can see how people get addicted to it.

Maybe that's why people are soo happy around Christmas time.

And on a completely opposite note, I will leave you with a video which I laughed a lot at tonight...



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